Tom Cruise on Scientology: We are the way to happiness and the authorities on the mind.

Here’s how Tom Cruise describes Scientology on a Church promotional video:

When you’re a Scientologist, and you drive by an accident, you know you have to do something about it, because you know you’re the only one who can really help. We are the authorities on getting people off drugs. We are the authorities on the mind…. We are the way to happiness. We can bring peace and unite cultures. Now is the time. Being a Scientologist. People are turning to you. If you are a Scientologist, you see things the way they are, in all their glory, in all their complexity… It’s rough and tumble. It’s wild and woolly. It’s a blast. It really is. It is fun. Because damn it, there is nothing better than going out there and fighting the fight, and suddenly you see — boom! — things are better. I want to know that I’ve done everything I can do, every day… I do what I can. And I do it the way I do everything.

 (Source: Gawker)

I’m glad I now know this. From now on I will always make sure that any police officer, firefighter, mental health professional, social worker, doctor, and source of wisdom that I seek help from is a Scientologist. No longer will I waste my time and endanger myself by entrusting ignorant and hapless non-Scientologists.

(Hat Tip: OddVincent)

5 Responses to “Tom Cruise on Scientology: We are the way to happiness and the authorities on the mind.”
  1. silver18 says:

    Always knew that Tom had a screw loose.

  2. ronbrown says:

    Apparently. But no one throws a better spazz than him on film. This, by the way, is a genuine compliment. The spaz he threw in Vanilla Sky was amazing. As was that in Jerry McGwire.

    “Oh….I see…..Well that’s good, because, for a second there, I thought we were talking about A FUCKING MASK!!!”


    “Don’t worrrry…Don’t worrrry. I’m not gonna do, what everyone thinks I’m gonna do and just FLIP OUT!”

  3. Rachel says:

    If you really want to do this to yourself, you can watch a video clip of Cruise espousing some of this bs here:

    It just goes to show you that looks can be, oh, so deceiving! Let’s just hope he won’t run for President…

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